My dreams are a significant part of who I am. And as such they reveal the stress and hope I happen to be experiencing at any given time. I have been working a ton the past few months. So much so that I haven’t had much time to write, especially this blog. But it’s all worth it, if you were wondering. I love my work. But I miss writing too. Stress can be very hazardous to the creative process.
I am no stranger to epic stories being born from one of my nighttime adventures. Sometimes the characters are reoccurring. I have recently been visited by one of my favorite characters, the Rat Guru. I have a series of short stories based on previous encounters with Renny, the Rat Guru. He is the oracle of the Rat Nation, and their leader. His divining gift manifests itself in gleaning insights and prophecies through his love of baking sweet things. He can see the future in cakes and creams.
This is what I wrote about him years ago after I first dreamed about him: I spoke with the Guru of the rat people over coffee and a slice of pineapple upside down cake. He is quite the exquisite baker. His cottage was quaint and decorated with antique furniture. Each table had a hand knotted lace doily laid upon it. The house was cozy and smelled of fruit pies and cinnamon. He wore robes the color of a spring sky, an azure blue. Upon his head he had a band of silver with the symbol for wisdom at his third eye. In the culture of the rat people the guru was a cherished icon of wisdom. He was revered as an infallible oracle. His visions were regarded as law and undisputed. He himself remained humble, scrying into baked goods instead of some fancy mirror or cauldron
Each time he invites me to tea we sit in the center of his garden. A large stone circle is laid out in the ground surrounded by walls of overgrown flowers and herbs. There is a stone archway at the East side of the circle large enough for a dragon to enter. And on several occasions dragons have joined us for tea and cakes. Today we sit in the circle having lavender tea and eating blackberry cobbler with vanilla bean infused cream. It is the most decadent thing I have tasted since meeting Renny.
Renny: I called you here because of yesterday’s strawberry cheesecake.
Me: You saw me in your cheesecake? That’s awesome, I love cheesecake.
Renny: I saw your destiny in my cheesecake, Sweetling.
Me: Oh no, not another destiny dream. I’m done with the dreaming. I just want to get to the manifesting part of this destiny bullshit.
Renny: You might as well just suck it up, Little One. You have so much more dreaming ahead. But this is completely different.
Me: Last time I was here you introduced me to a unicorn, a Minotaur, and an Elvin prince. Are they coming to tea to gang up on me too?
Renny: No they aren’t. But you might listen if I sick the Minotaur on you again. We all agree, however, that it may not be wise to trust you with your own destiny.
Me: Why not?
Renny: Do you remember that story you started by never finished called The Time Yard?
Renny: Well, you are sort of stuck in The Time Yard. Not going forward, not going back. Just spinning in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Me: I’m not sure I follow. The Time Yard was filled with architecture and misplaced road signs.
Renny: Exactly. You are building a huge castle using the wrong signs.
Renny: You took the right leap of faith, found the right job, but forgot bring your castle. It’s still out of synch with the rest of you.
Me: You saw an out of synch castle in your cheesecake?
Renny: Your castle is on the hill just waiting for you to find the doorway. It is about resetting the timeline back to where you were when you took that leap of faith, when you were ok with not controlling your destiny and letting the signs lead the way. More cobbler, Sweetling?
Me: Yes, please. You are basically telling me to let go, aren’t you?
Renny: Yes and no. There’s more.
Me: Of course there is.
The stone archway shimmered with light and a small brown tortoise wearing a box shaped hat made from bamboo walked through much more briskly than I would have expected of a tortoise. Renny told me his name was Tito.
Tito: I am not an Earth tortoise, silly girl. I can move around quite sufficiently.
Me: You can read minds, I assume.
Tito: Indeed. And we have a matter to discuss.
Me: About The Time Yard?
Tito: No, this is not about that piece of fiction you wrote. It’s about one you are writing right now.
Me: Ok? Which one?
Tito: Are you committed to the story, girl? If you are going to keep writing that screenplay, you must be committed to that story. It’s a rather large piece of yourself.
Me: I know.
Tito: Well, are you?
Tito: Good. We want you to keep going and stand strong when the wind picks up. Because it will.
Renny: Sweetling, you see, this isn’t just about you any longer. You are writing for more than just you. So be sure you are ready for a storm. Good, bad, indifferent, you will need to be sure of yourself.
Tito: I have no patience for half-assery. So get to finishing what you started and be proud of it.
Me: This whole afternoon tea is about my writing? My destiny, that I am not to be trusted with, is what I write? How can I keep from being in control of it if it’s what I’m writing?
Renny: You need to let the story tell itself, it’s already in you.
Tito: Control where you put the periods and commas, not the message. You are too wrapped up in “I can’t” and “It’s not what so-and-so would do”. Get over it and write your story, your way. The strength of your character will show itself.
Me: So do I need to revisit writing The Time Yard or not?
Renny: Revisit it when the other three projects are finished.
Me: I do tend to start too many things at once, don’t I?
Tito: That is exactly what I mean by half-assery. You are a nuisance to yourself, girl. At least you are good at being a nurse. That gives me some hope.
Renny: Don’t be hard on the poor girl, Tito. She’s under a lot of stress. I think we’ve made our point.
Renny tipped his teacup and the entire garden disappeared with a wink.