Category Archives: Stupid Human Gets A Clue

The evolution of a human girl named Amy.

So Long And Thanks For All The Converse

A few days ago I received news that my best friend of 23 years had passed away, hopefully peacefully in his sleep. Saying goodbye is the most heart-wrenching thing I’ll ever have to do. I loved him more than a … Continue reading

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Real Women

I’m perplexed by the phrase “Real Woman”. There is no such thing as a fake woman. Every woman is a real woman. Beautiful women are real. Ugly women are real. Rich women are real. Poor are real. Strong women are … Continue reading

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How to Plant a Yes Garden

How to plant a Yes Garden: Step 1: Say yes. Step 2: Watch things grow.

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Getting Old at the Grocery Store

I went to buy a few things today: milk, ice cream, wine, and Prilosec. I didn’t feel old buying these things. That was until the young girl at the check out looked at my ID and said, “Wow, you don’t … Continue reading

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The Power of Fear

This is a message to all those tired of body shamers, victim blamers, squashers of humanity, its nature and idiosyncrasies. We are all humans. Born with innate Imperfection, striving toward perfection. Born with sin. Sin in this case is imperfection, … Continue reading

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Crow’s Feet Are a Rite of Passage to Fabulous, Right?

So, today I discovered my first crow’s feet. At first it struck a nerve about looking old. Then the more I contemplated it, and I did contemplate it for hours, the more I realized that those little lines are a … Continue reading

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The Awkward’s Guide to Being Fabulous

Hello, my name is Amy and I walk into walls. Daily. Don’t be alarmed, I’m mostly harmless and incredibly fabulous. Being an oaf does not have to hold you back from being amazing and sexy. In fact, there are many … Continue reading

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Before Midnight: Not a review, a reaction.

This evening I finished watching the Before Trilogy with the film Before Midnight by Richard Linklater. I must admit that I did not see, in their entirety, the other two films until last week. Regardless, they affected me in a … Continue reading

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Finding Film Part 1: James Benning

Impressions and Lessons “The old medicine man smiles through the face of nature. The old medicine man captures the face of nature within the eyes of his camera.” Part of my compulsion to move to Austin had to do with … Continue reading

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All Roads Lead to Austin

Still under the beguilement of exhaustion and adventure, I make my way towards manifesting exactly what I set out to do in Austin. I am truly living my dreams right now in this magical realm that I am building around … Continue reading

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Older & More Awesome Every Day

Today is my birthday. This is how it feels to grow older when you are a motherfucking warrior goddess. Years only add to the awesome.

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Thank You 2012

2012 was an amazing year of transformation. So many things have been accomplished, dreamed, realized, and let go. Here is a list of the things that made 2012 the year of awakening. I lost 55 lbs. and gained the confidence … Continue reading

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Everyone’s a critic: Django Unchained

Sorry for the absence, my pretties. I hope you all had a wonderful holiday. I kept busy working the Alzheimer’s unit, being a naughty little angel by dancing like the dance of the sugarplum fairy for my demented old folks. … Continue reading

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Lizzard Wisdom: Dream On

Lizzard Wisdom #32564 Live your dreams. Except for that one dream where you are running naked up the highway being chased by rabid beavers in pink cowboy hats carrying axes. Don’t live that one unless you are leading them into … Continue reading

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Dreamscapes: Bruce Lee’s Grave Guardian

I had the most vivid dream yesterday. It was about Bruce Lee. Which isn’t strange considering my obsession with all things kung fu. After all, my rollergirl persona was Loose Lee. Bruce Lee has been an influence in my life … Continue reading

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Dear Sunday: Enlightenment of Chocolate Moose

Dear Sunday, I was hoping to be free of deep thought as I prepare for a long night at work. However, you have other plans for my time. I appreciate the insight into myself and the connections we make in … Continue reading

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Lizzard Wisdom

I am truly successful when payday comes the day before I run out of toilet paper.   Stay optimistic, my friends.

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Is that Gozer in your ice box or are you just happy to see me?

Bustin’ Makes Me Feel Good Watching Ghostbusters makes me feel less crazy. Mostly because of Bill Murray. But also because it makes my current soiree in the paranormal or supernatural seem perfectly legit. Yep guys, I’m all about life imitating … Continue reading

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Short & Sweet

Short and sweet: As an American, a woman, a non-christian, pro gay rights, rape survivor, and pro equal rights to all human beings, tonight has given me hope that the entire nation hasn’t forsaken human decency. But the fight for … Continue reading

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I wish were an Oscar Mayer Wiener

Oh dreams, you are not helping matters any. Also, this conversation is going into the book. It fits perfectly. Today’s dream included many images of ancient gods, new gods, and the Oscar Mayer Wiener mobile. Pan was sniffing around my … Continue reading

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