Category Archives: Absurdity Is The Only Reality

Giant Rat Parsons Project

Posted on April 18, 2013 by

So I had a dream last night that a quartet of giant sewer rats were singing an Alan Parsons Project song to me while I sat in a jazz club sipping on a bright blue drink out of glass shaped … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Music Is The Best, My Public Dream Journal | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

How to meet your idols and eat their chocolate: Part 1

Posted on March 16, 2013 by

A few nights ago I attended a wonderful event here at SXSW. It was called People of Letters, a travelling letter writing brigade from Australia. The panel of letter writers was impressive, from my writing guru Neil Gaiman and his … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Artistically Inclined, The Life And Times Of Fuzzy Lizzard | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Lizzard Wisdom: Word Peeves

Posted on February 23, 2013 by

Kids, the word is bra, not brawl. Although, my tits do tend to brawl with the wire bondage of my bra. Fuck, nevermind. I guess you’re right. Go ahead and call it a goddamn brawl. 

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My Valentine’s Gift To You Is My Own Personal Embarrassment

Posted on February 14, 2013 by

Since today is Valentine’s Day and everyone is all excited in one way or another over it, I thought I’d share an old (I mean old) online personals ad description of me. I think it still applies. Although, I am … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, The Life And Times Of Fuzzy Lizzard | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Ghetto Gourmet: We Have a Serious Lack of Pancakes Around Here

Posted on January 19, 2013 by

I would write another installment of Ghetto Gourmet, but I am too busy thinking about pancakes and the fact that I don’t have any. This lack of pancakes is weighing heavily on my mind. So much so that I can … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Ghetto Gourmet | Tagged , , , , | 3 Comments

Do I really need a reason to casually mention Joan Wilder?

Posted on January 7, 2013 by

For those wondering, I am not dead yet. Although the germ infested elderly were plotting my demise. Lucky for me they forgot the plan about a minute after they plotted. I caught their plague of doom anyway. I am on … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, My Public Dream Journal, Zombie Toes | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Lizzard thought of the night

Posted on January 3, 2013 by

Random thought of the night: This time last year I didn’t know who the fuck Robert Rodriguez was. Now I’m making an army of mutant octopi inspired by him. Life is weird.

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Artistically Inclined | Tagged , , | 3 Comments

Hugging Death Traps

Posted on December 29, 2012 by

I’m sure you all want to know what it’s like to have a conversation with me. So here is a short conversation I had with my best friend about the fact that I am stuck at work chasing after the … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, El Rey Pulpo, The Life And Times Of Fuzzy Lizzard, Zombie Toes | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Oracle of Austin

Posted on December 20, 2012 by

Austin, Here I Come The time has come for me to start getting serious about the job search in Austin. Which I have been doing the past few weeks. While I was perusing the online job listings earlier, I came … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, The Life And Times Of Fuzzy Lizzard | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Asshole Free Zone

Posted on December 18, 2012 by

This is a public service announcement: I operate an asshole free zone. Let me repeat that; this is an asshole free zone. If you feel that your very existence dictates that you must be an asshole, do not waste your … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Who’s That GPS?

Posted on December 17, 2012 by

I took a few days off from blogging to spend time with my family. I hugged my mother, my sisters, my nieces, and my nephews extra tight. Then I spent time with myself, appreciating how much I’ve grown in 2012. … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Artistically Inclined, The Life And Times Of Fuzzy Lizzard | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Words of Wisdom

Posted on December 13, 2012 by

I’m sorry guys, I don’t have time for a real post today. I overslept and only have 15 minutes before I have to leave for work. So I will simply post this picture of Moses with the most important commandment … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality | Tagged , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Lizzard Wisdom: Dream On

Posted on December 10, 2012 by

Lizzard Wisdom #32564 Live your dreams. Except for that one dream where you are running naked up the highway being chased by rabid beavers in pink cowboy hats carrying axes. Don’t live that one unless you are leading them into … Continue reading →

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How I spent Robby Benson Day

Posted on December 4, 2012 by

Did you motherfuckers know that Dec. 3rd was Robby Benson Day? I declared it as such earlier today. This is your lucky day. I am going to give you insight on how I spend my day on Facebook.  Don’t worry … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, The Life And Times Of Fuzzy Lizzard | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Technical Difficulties, please stand by

Posted on December 3, 2012 by

Apologies to anyone who has tried to view the last few posts containing the new El Rey Pulpo commissioned pieces. I am having technical difficulties with uploading the images. I will try again soon. Please think happy thoughts that machines will love … Continue reading →

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Cooking for One: The Ghetto Gourmet

Posted on November 9, 2012 by

Cooking from the ghetto pantry: Vol. 1 I am not a great cook. I am not a terrible cook. I don’t like to cook. So is the life of a single woman. My style is something I like to call … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Ghetto Gourmet, The Life And Times Of Fuzzy Lizzard | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Is that Gozer in your ice box or are you just happy to see me?

Posted on November 9, 2012 by

Bustin’ Makes Me Feel Good Watching Ghostbusters makes me feel less crazy. Mostly because of Bill Murray. But also because it makes my current soiree in the paranormal or supernatural seem perfectly legit. Yep guys, I’m all about life imitating … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Stupid Human Gets A Clue, Zombie Toes | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

I Want A Do Over

Posted on November 4, 2012 by

Today is useless. Let’s just start over and hope for a better tomorrow. Tomorrow should include the following: Coffee Kung fu movies Lasagna Cake or Pie or both A back rub from a scantily clad man in a kilt Aliens (illegal or … Continue reading →

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Waterproof paper

Posted on November 2, 2012 by

Short update on what NaNoWriMo is doing to me. And it’s only day 2. I ran out of the shower to type a brilliant realization about an important character without bothering to rinse the shampoo. I am now crying. Both because of … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality, Original Writing By The Fuzzy Lizzard | Tagged , , , , | 10 Comments

The age old debate

Posted on November 1, 2012 by

Pie vs. Cake I have always claimed to be team pie. Pie is filled with delicious fruits or pudding. Pie is like a heaven sandwich with awesome inside. My favorite pies tend to be banana cream and apple. But I … Continue reading →

Posted in Absurdity Is The Only Reality | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 22 Comments